Have you ever felt like what you just did or said was something that your parents would have done years ago. Maybe there’s small actions you find yourself doing as you get older and think, “Oh God, I’m turning into my Mother!”
It’s true. I don’t know why it seems to happen more over time. I mean we don’t live at home anymore. We don’t see these traits or habits on a regular basis but it seems to grow with time.
You’ve probably heard me talk about how we inherit more than eye or hair color. That we inherit past emotions, traumas and beliefs as well.
We all have baggage.
It’s like you’re born preprogrammed with someone else’s baggage, that weighs you down. It causes you to trip or worse, keeps you tied in one place unable to move forward at all.
You have all that inherited stuff, some good and some not. But how about what you pick up after your’re born?
Under the age of 5 we’re all like huge sponges. We take in everything that’s put in front of us. It’s the hyper mode of human development. It’s needed for survival, socialization and so much more, but there’s a lot we could most likely do without.
For instance, if your family struggled financially and there was a lot of stress around lack of money or finding a job, then you could have absorbed a lot of that, adding it to your internal programing.
You may find yourself as an adult, struggling with making money, even if you have a good education and talent.
Why is it such a struggle?
That old programing keeps you stuck. It keeps reminding you that life is hard. It may say there aren’t any jobs. Do you remember when you heard your Dad say that? Does it sound familiar to you now?
I remember my Dad saying, “You don’t need the best and I was made to feel guilty for wanting it. It took me years to get that programing out of my head.
Early in my marriage my husband would buy me something nice and often I would feel bad and take it back. I felt I didn’t need something as good as that and we could use the money for something else more important.
I’m happy to say I’ve learned to clear that old programing and much more. Once I realized it wasn’t really my own thoughts and that I wanted to have a different belief system, things in my life started flowing much easier.
I was able to attract more of life’s very best gems.
Just because you were born with certain programing doesn’t mean you have to keep it.
The beauty of life is, it’s yours to mold into whatever you want. You can continue on in the pattern that you’re used to, or you can choose to release what no longer serves you and create a life you love.
It’s all up to you.
Believe me, it’s not that hard and with my tools it’s so simple.
Are you ready to get rid of some of your baggage?
If you want to learn more about one of my favorite techniques The Healing Codes to start clearing out what’s holding you back, get my free e-book HERE.
I find there’s quite a lot to unwind! It’s good if you can get started on this early. Thanks for the encouraging story, Melissa.
Thanks Sandra. I agree the earlier the better <3
Melissa,
What a great post. So true! While I had a great childhood with good parents, the programming I received was not serving me well at all as an adult. Becaming aware of this background and inserting my own beliefs has drastically changed my life for the better.
That’s so great Debbie. I think many people believe we are what we are and there’s no way to change it. It’s so empowering to make the shifts needed to create a better life. Thanks for stopping by sweetie <3
It’s amazing how powerful those beliefs that are secretly tucked away in our subconscious can be. I’ve been working on clearing a variety of limiting beliefs in the area of finances. It seems that I’ve created a glass ceiling for myself that needs to be shattered.
Oh I hear you Paige. But I love how layer by layer they uncover everything we need, to be open to receiving the best the universe has to offer. So cool! It’s totally doable.
Thank you Melissa! I agree. I also think that there are two levels of programming. One is the level we try to focus on in therapy – the stuff we’re aware of or can access after some time and probing, and then there is the stuff that’s not accessible. It’s just there and we’re unaware. It is too basic to even be available on a level where we can put language to it. I think that’s part of why your codes are so amazing. They work even if we can’t explain what or why we are blocked. They just “untie the knots”.
Thanks Jessica, I agree with you. I love your words “Untie the knots,” perfectly said girl! Thanks for visiting. I love when you stop by 🙂
Yes I have found The Journey process with Brandon Bays is wonderful for releasing so much that we don’t ever know we have picked up
Thanks for raising this big hugs Suzie xx
Thanks Suzie, Yes I’ve looked into that process as well. It’s great when you can find something that resonates with you and makes the changes possible. Thanks for being YOU <3
Hi Melissa,
This has come to my attention more and more as I get older. I specifically thought about it when I was wondering to myself why my mother continued to do something that didn’t really work well. And how that impacts a child’s place, like what they pick up from them and the gap between where they want to be and where they are.
When I notice that I’m doing things that my mother typically does that I find counterproductive I change my behavior. Then always try to be aware in case I slip back into it.
It might feel a little harder but like you said, it’s not written in stone and you can turn things around. Encouraging story!
~Lea
Totally Lea! You understand ohhhh so well and I love that. It’s so easy to slip back into that role even when we ARE aware of it. It’s why tools help so much in helping it stick.. We’re all so different so whatever helps you the most is great.
Thanks for stopping by sweetie. Love your energy!
This is so spot on!
It took me a lot of time to even recognize that in my family we had a habit of not talking about uncomfortable things.
It then probably took just as long to implement the opposite as a habit: talking about uncomfortable events as they happen.
Luckily my girlfriend has been super supportive in this process and we regularly talk about the things that trouble our minds now (this week she felt really stressed because of lots of due dates at school).
But we also have lots of positive baggage I think.
What’s a positive piece of baggage your parents left you with, Melissa?
Cheers from Germany,
Nik
Hi Nik,
Thanks for stopping by here. I missed your comment at first, sorry. I inherited so many great things from my parents but I think the best was my Mom’s ability to make it through just about anything. She’s one of the strongest women I know 🙂 Love her so much!
Hey Melissa, no worries, thanks for getting back to me!
Ah persistence, that is probably the most important trait one can have!
I love this quote that makes that point very simply, but clearly:
The person who makes it is the person who keeps on going after everyone else has quit – Jerry Weintraub
Anyway, keep up the great work Melissa! 🙂