Really, don’t just settle for Stress management… Heal stress altogether!
There’s more at stake than just a headache if you are stressing out. Stress is the number one cause of illness and disease. It lowers your immune system, fatigues your adrenals and dumbs you down. It results in angry, rocky relationships and pretty much affects every area of your life, in one way or another.
After hitting a low point from stress years ago, I was left with having to make some hard decisions. I needed to figure out how to handle my emotions better or they were going to take me down.
I was told I needed to learn to manage my stress load. To figure out a way to cope with it.
My health had become very poor and I struggled with my relationships and I felt like every day was a big fight to be won or lost depending on how I played everything out. I would plan strategically ahead, to avoid future danger.
I was in Self Protect Mode
But this mode only made me more scared, resulting in more stress and the vicious cycle of more actual danger to my health.
I couldn’t take it any longer. Everything and everyone seemed to be something I needed to protect myself from. I was the only one who would take care of and protect ME.
But I wasn’t handling that job very well.
Life seemed so hard and was not easy to turn around. If you are in protect mode, every cell in your body reacts in the same way. Nutrients don’t absorb easily, as all those systems are more closed off, barely functioning in maintenance mode.
Think about it…
If you are in self-protector in Fight or Flight, everything goes into survival mode. We are built to fight or run in that mode. All other functions like eating or sleeping are put on the back burner.
The hardest thing can be changed.
When you are in that high-stress state it is so incredibly hard to stop that cycle. Many people will say meditate or just relax your mind.
I had people suggest over and over to just start thinking positive thoughts? Repeat lot’s of affirmations.
I’m here to tell you when you are suffering from anxiety and fear as well as a number of other highly charged emotions, that being positive is nearly impossible.
I needed help… Something to get me out of my own head.
I knew if I didn’t change how I looked at things and literally felt about them, it could harm my life permanently. It wasn’t just about changing how I responded. I know that the management of feelings is popular right now but there is a difference.
Changing how you respond means you have more control of yourself, which is great.

Changing how you “feel” or see things is more about your perception.
If you are changing your perception and seeing things more positive, that means your emotions are totally different at that point. You are looking at the glass half full, instead of half empty. You are seeing your future as more promising, instead of with fear of the worst.
This all boils down to a reduction of your stress and an increase in your overall happiness, health, and wellbeing.
I found several methods over the years that literally saved my life and I am so grateful for these tools, that God so generously offered me. The timing was perfect and when I most needed it. It was also most likely the best time to receive and use that information.
God’s Timing is Always Perfect.
There are many wonderful tools and programs available to help you with stress and I hope you will start experimenting with them. Of course my all time favorite is The Healing Codes. They have a wonderful program you might want to try out. You can read more about that HERE.
If you would like some help with implementing that change in your life and want to experience the changes The Healing Codes can offer, please contact me HERE to start creating a healthier you!
Super post Melissa. It’s so true that changing our perspective about circumstances changes everything, even our levels of stress. I’ve found even just small shifts in how I view things can make all the difference.
Yes, I agree and sometimes baby steps is the only way to start. Thanks so much for stopping by Elle! I always love hearing your views 😉
We’re so programmed to manage symptoms instead of addressing root causes. Managing stress doesn’t address the cause of the stress. The assumption is that we have to maintain crazy schedules and lives to “keep up” and just deal with the stress that accompanies that lifestyle. Keep up with what or who? And why does it matter?
Yes, changing how you see and interpret things makes a world of difference, in your heart and in your life.
Great post Melissa!
Hi Paige, thanks!
Yes it’s so true! Who are we trying to keep up with. It is such a wide range of issues too. I have 4 kids and I see some parents have their kids in 2-3 activities each. When I said to each of my children, you get to pick one each at a time, I felt kinda guilty. Now I just feel “sane.” Most of the time it’s a choice. Don’t manage… change. An example is, one of the questions I would ask, “why do you feel like you need to have your kids signed up for so many activities?” Usually the answer was tied to guilt. Everyone else did, so if they didn’t they wouldn’t be as good of parents. So sad… Working on freeing that guilt and comparisons is key to letting that one go.
Thanks so much for stopping by!
Great post Melissa – everything begins to shift the moment we change our perspective. That subtle shift allows feelings that support in those stressful times. I went through a really high stress time in my late 20’s – I hadn’t learned any tools to cope at that time so my anxiety went through the roof. I remember how scared I was – I felt so out of control. As I look back now, I know I needed to go through this to start learning exactly what you mention above. So many need the comfort of learning the ease of changing your perspective – thank you so much for sharing this!
I hear you Paige!
I agree 100% . When someone is going through those times, it is hard to grasp that change is within their reach. They can be free of the pain. It’s totally doable. Once you get that momentum going it becomes easier and easier. Thanks for being here and sharing your insight! I appreciate it.
Wow, Melissa! Amazing stuff. It’s really true – sometimes we just have to stop and look at our lives. Often they are packed way too full and then we wonder why the heck we feel stressed out. But then, sometimes there are deeper causes of stress – things that can’t be solved by slowing down and taking on less. Things that started way before we “knew better” and have now taken on a life of their own. That’s why the healing codes sound so amazing. I did a little poking around on your site and I have to say, I’m intrigued!
This is so true! It is always up to us to change our perspective, but we so often can’t see how to best go about it.
One thing i realized for myself is that i just don’t handle stress well at all. Things that do not affect other people feel stressful to me, and I have come to a point where I can accept that and not beat myself up for it. With the slightest sign of stress i now go into breathing, or yoga, or nature, or stroking an animal, until i feel stable again.
Love your posts!
A cyber hug
Thats so great Jutta! Yes finding that thing or things that help bring us back into balance is so important. I exercise regularly to help with the accumulated stress but also do simple things like knit and crochet. Someone else may find those hobbies totally boring and it wouldn’t help them. I always recommend that my clients look for something… anything that brings them that enjoyment and peace.
Thanks for visiting girl! Enjoy having you here!
Melissa,
I really appreciate the reminders! I have a stressful weekend coming up and this is just what I needed to read! I love the quote by Wayne Dyer: If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change. A good mantra to have during stressful times.
Looking forward to more posts!
Oh, I LOVE that quote! He always has good solid advice and a great way of saying it. I have to say I’m loving the images you are putting through on your Facebook Feed. Beautiful inspiring quotes as well. I love those and love sharing them as well!
Thanks for being here I appreciate it!
((hugs))
PS good luck this weekend 😉
When you peel back the layers and get to the root cause of the anxiety and stress, that is when the healing began for me. I too have gone through some stressful times in my life and I can so relate to your line, “if I didn’t change how I looked at things and literally felt about them, it could harm my life permanently.” Real change comes from within and to changing our perspective one step at a time works for me. Thanks for a great post!
Thanks Cathy,
It’s so nice for others to see people like us who have been THERE and made it through it. Life can be different if we just reach for it a little more every day. Changing our perspectives, thoughts, perceptions and using tools to help with all of that make it so much easier. Life CAN be better. At one point I didn’t even know if I would get through the stage I was in. I thought, “this is it… this is all I get.” Not good, that hopeless feeling. My wish is, that whatever method people use to help get them to a better life, that they just keep trying until they find a fit. Perseverance baby! That’s where it’s at 😉
Take care