For some time now Iβve loved photography.
I love capturing the lives around me in snapshots.
Something deep within me needs to be able to transform the happiest moments I see into something solid.
Something eternal.
I usually stick to taking photos of people and that special something I see in their eyes, the connection they are feeling, as well as the beauty I see from my angle.
And most of all itβs the joyful moments that I never want to forget.
Thatβs why I decided to put my camera down more.
βWait, What?β Youβre probably asking.
You see my husband and I were at my daughterβs basketball game this last year and there I was shooting away.Β I kept βjust missingβ that perfect shot of her making a great move.
As I was looking through the lens I couldnβt see everything. At least not in the way I should be experiencing it.
My husband whispered over to me, βPut that down you’re missing too much.β
Are you missing out on life?
After the gam, my husband, who can be so full of wisdom, said to me, βEvery time you take a photo, Β youβre actually missing living in the moment.β
I was stunned. Thatβs not true! I felt like I was making that moment last longer. Stretching it to last a lifetime so I could relive it over and over.
As I thought about this over several days, I came to a conclusion.
He is right⦠I can see him smiling smugly over this-lol. Gotta love that guy!
Those moments only happen once.
You can never get that moment back in a photo. Yes, you may get a version of it but itβs not as powerful as living it.
Living in the present and experiencing the emotions in real time is where it’s at.
But how could I put my camera down when itβs become such a part of me?
Aaaand I just bought a new lens-Ha!
Finding a Healthy Balance.
Well I decided to set limits for myself in this. I would take some photos, capture a few moments, then set my camera down so I could fully take everything in.
I can say it felt really good doing that.Β It has actually shown me how to live more in the now than ever.
Are you doing things in your life that keep you from living fully in the present?
It can be anything really. Iβve seen people use things like their houses not being clean enough to have friends over.
Maybe itβs not being at your ideal weight, which is stopping you from getting out into the dating scene again.
Or youβve got so much work to do, that you never stop to smell the flowers.
Anything that separates you from living your life needs to be looked at closely.
Here are some hints that may help you find what it is that is blocking you from your desired life.
Ask yourself these questions
What do I gain from this separation?
What is this protecting me from? Could I get hurt by something here?
Do I fear that I may not have those great moments again? Maybe stopping before having them will prevent future pain.
Is there a fear of rejection if I participate more?
Itβs time to heal
If you can bring these forward you have taken the first step to healing.
By just acknowledging them, you have made a significant shift. Now you know what to consciously start working toward.
What things separate you from your Gems in life?
I would love to hear what has kept you separated from living your life in the moment.Β please share in the comments below.
I loved this line the most: Anything that separates you from living your life needs to be looked at closely.
Living fully, mindfully doesn’t have to mean perfect! I confess I went through some of the points you mentioned, but quickly snapped out of it. Being bogged down was no excuse.
Wonderful post, Melissa!
So true Vidya! Keep up the good work.
Have a great rest of the week π And thanks for stopping by!
Oh, I really like your “take away” message here…I didn’t see it coming by your title π I stop being fully present when my thoughts hijack the present by taking me way into the future, and the future is not predictable. Like monkey mind I can start to have my thoughts race and spiral! The future doesn’t flow according to my plan, but the plan of someone or something much bigger than myself!
Love that Stacey! We can become so attached to what we want, trying to control the outcome. We forget that if we detach and just put the ‘feeling’ we want from the experience, miracles can happen. So many times by letting go of the ‘hows’ we get even more than we could ever dream of. I always ask, ‘For this or better’. Then let go. Or try to as best I can π you know how THAT can go-lol. Practice makes perfect right?
Ack, you’re making me confess! Like your camera example, it’s technology for me – namely my phone and my laptop that are causing me to miss out on the present. Ironically, I hate it when I see other people always checking their phones, and now I’ve become that person! Admitting it is the first step, right?
Hi Beth,
Yes it’s hard for sure. Especially when you run an internet type biz like I do π I’m still refining how I do things to maintain a balance. It’ll all come together, especially when we are aware and wanting to make changes. I’m right there beside you!
Thanks for visiting!
I think that there is a lot more holding me back from enjoying my life I have raised 5 children on my own and never really had financial support from there father so I did it on my own so now there is only one left at home to raise I find myself not knowing who.I m or where to go to live a life I desire or really no where to start .
Hi Marianne,
So glad you stopped by. Yes i can see how that would be so hard. You are amazing that you have done it!!! Now it’s time to really start thinking of YOU for a change. It’s your time to replenish and build your life. What do you enjoy? It would be a great time to explore right now. There are so many things that bring out creativity in this world. Start by trying to get clear and let it all flow in. Do you have an of my tutorials on getting clear? If not send me an email and I will send you the link to help. melissa@melissazoske.com
So much truth in this post.
I was backing up my photos recently and noticed that with the exception of the first day of school I have taken almost no pictures this year with my “good” camera. I have mixed feelings on that because I LOVE looking back on beautiful photos of my family and places – but I also love being in the moment.
Guess I’m still looking for that balance. π
That’s the name of the game, right Britt? Balance… I always feel the best when I have it but sometimes it takes a bit more work and awareness. I personally hope you add a few more pics with your good camera π
You’re totally right, Melissa: we should live the present. This is one of the reasons why I never take pictures. Unfortunately, I’m not able to do it anyway, since I’m usually obsessed either by regrets and the sense of guilt from the past, or by anxiety about the future.
Federico
I hope you can find your right balance and peace Federico. Sometimes the darker periods in our lives can feel like they last forever. You are in my thoughts.
Blessings to you.
Thank you Melissa!
It’s amazing you reply to all comments, taking care of everyone!
Federico
Let’s together give thanks for husbands that keep us grounded, Melissa! π
I totally agree with the concept of living in the present and love to talk about, but how difficult it is to actually live this way.
Thanks for the reminder! β₯
Amen Sister!
I am so grateful for these good men! Yes living in the present but learning from the past without getting drawn into the negative side is so important. Then of course the mot worrying about the future… Geeeesh it can be a full time job. Thankfully it get’s easier as time passes. Like gratitude, it keeps building onto itself until you are overflowing. Living in the present becomes very addictive π
Wow Melissa, I can see from all the comments here that you struck a cord in all of us.
Love this topic and you nailed it my friend! As I think back to when my children were tots, I realize that I missed so much because I was lost in my head…overthinking something I had noticed, even if it was something I was noticing in the moment. It made me realize that the thoughts in my head was the same as lifting the camera to find the perfect shot. Both tried to capture a fleeting moment instead of simply witnessing this.
Brilliant!
Fully partcipating in the moment you are currently living is so important to happiness. I am glad you learned that lesson. I was at a concert and over half of the people were recording the concert through their phones and watching it through their phones. They weren’t just experiencing for their memories.
It makes me think of a Robin Williams standup where he talks about this phenomenon. You should look it up. It is really funny.
Thanks Sebastian,
I totally agree. It’s a hard habit to break for some but so nice. I was at a family reunion this weekend and I set aside time to take photos but when I was done, I was DONE π
I’ll look up Robin’s video. Thanks for suggesting that. It’s so sad he’s gone. He had such a way of lifting others up. He’ll be missed.
Thanks for stopping by and have a great week π